Captain Cook is My Homeboy

After Fraser Island and an overnight greyhound bus to Airlie Beach [Matt - We definitely brought up the average age on that bus by at least 10 years], we boarded the SV Whitehaven for a 2 night, 3 day tour of the Whitsunday Islands. During the 3 days of island hopping, I single-handedly fed the entire population of sandflies in Australia. Who doesn't like them some all-you-can-eat Chinese buffet?

The Whitehaven was a pretty old vessel and we later found out an "eco" ship (which basically translates to Old, Dirty Boat). I've also discovered that tour groups are getting smart now by labeling their tours as "eco" to appeal to the growing population of doe-eyed, "green", backpackers, determined to detoxify the Earth one Free Tibet sticker at a time. A truth in advertising translation of "eco" is: broke-ass accomodations where you have to hand pump your own toilet; take 2 minute cold showers, and "rinse" your own dishes in a communal wash bin. Let's just say our ship's carbon footprint was pretty small.

Besides being a little old and worn, the Whitehaven was charming in every other aspect. The people onboard were fun and again, mostly colleged-aged European backpackers. Everyone commented that in their long travels, we were the first American they've encountered. I love talking to Europeans and discovering that everyone loves to trash the French but the Germans hate the Dutch even more, and that they pretend not to understand the Swiss Germans and the Austrians. Meanwhile, my mom has repeatedly asked me to stop referring to my non-American friends by their nationality. "Connie-ya, why you like confuse me? Why not all white?"

While touring the Whitsunday Islands, we were once again edumacated on the heroic plight of Captain James Cook, Australia and New Zeland's boy wonder. First, we were told that the Whitsundays were so baptized because Captain Cook discovered it on what he thought was a Sunday during the Whit period of Easter. Our fearless navigator didn't realize he crossed the international dateline and it was actually Monday. Then, we docked for a night at Sid Harbor, made famous by Captain Cook's dog who died and was laid to rest at the harbor. We passed a group of rocks in New Zealand that lives in infamy as the rocks that almost caused the sinking of Captain Cook's ship. I'm really curious if there is a plaque somewhere that says "Captain Cook Farted Here".

The Whitsunday Islands came to a fun and dirty end. I did my first snorkel in the Great Barrier Reef and finally sunned on sand so pure that even under the hot, hot sun, stays cool because the silica reflected all of the sun's rays. I also found out that coral is really just solidified poop. So the GBR is essentially the largest piece of turd in the world, and unlike the Great Wall of China (which also has it's share of fecies), is actually visible from space.

Oh and I licked a tree ant because our guide said their skin is full of Vitamin-C and I wasn't about to get no scurvy. Tasted like a sour patch kid without the fruity, chewiness afterwards.

So long, farewell, Auf wiedersehen, adieu,
Connie